I had forgotten all about my Aunt Barbara’s 2nd wedding to Ernest Smith until a friend sent me these strips. It took place the day after Christmas, December 26, 1966. You can see the Christmas tree in the first frame, first strip. My grandmother never put the tree up before Christmas Eve. The marriage was short lived and ended after several years. Barbara became Cardinal Nandi and went on to successfully manage the Bookstores and Cultural Centers of the Shrines of the Black Madonna.
You can click to enlarge the pictures a bit.
At the church.The reception on Atkinson at my Grandmother’s house. There I am in the first frame, between my cousin and my sisterMore from the reception.
It was 1968. In the United States and around the world there were demonstrations, wars in Vietnam and Biafra, police actions in Mexico and Chicago, riots and tanks in the streets of Prague. Martin Luther King and Robert Kennedy were assassinated. People fighting for their rights were wondering how to change their tactics to fit the repression.
Today is the 103th Anniversary of the birth of my father, Albert B. Cleage Jr (Aka Jaramogi Abebe Ageyeman). In remberance, I am posting his sermon notes from June 23, 1968 where he preached about changes needed to program ourselves for Power instead of slavery. Click to enlarge.
This picture comes from a book belonging to my Graham grandparents ‘The Young Folks Treasury – Ideal Home Life.’ I always thought of it as being in one of the big houses on East Grand Blvd. we drove past on the way from the grandparents to Belle Isle. I didn’t know it was a Swedish. When we lived in the parsonage on Chicago, we had dining room furniture that was big and heavy and looked sort of like this. We only ate one meal there, the Thanksgiving dinner before my parents separated in 1954. It may still be in use in room off of Fellowship Hall at the Shrine of the Black Madonna on Linwood. Anyway, it always had a feeling of ‘home’ for me, even though I never witnessed a scene like this in real life. I probably read too many old books.
When I was growing up, home was where my family lived. I didn’t think about how long we’d be there or where it was, it was home. And when we moved again (as we regularly did), the new place was home. Our familiar furniture and books were there. We ate together in breakfast or dining room, the familiar food. My sister and I did our same chores.
When I was 13 we moved into the first house we bought. We lived there almost 10 years, longer than any place else I lived up to that point. It was at 5397 Oregon. Because it was where we lived the longest, memories of home often center on this house. When I was a senior in college we moved to a 2 family flat with my grandparents. By that time I was planning my escape out into the world and that flat always felt temporary. In 6 month I graduated and was gone.
Drawings and photographs of 4 of the 20 houses I’ve lived in.
During my early years on my own, the house I lived in wasn’t always “home”. In my early 20s, I moved 7 times in 3 years. Living in back rooms, attics, other people’s houses, temporary apartments, always waiting/watching for the next place to go.
It usually takes a certain amount of time for a place to feel like home to me. Some places feel more friendly than others. After a year it begins to feel permanent, even though none have been forever so far. Although we usually move everything, or most everything, with us, several times we have not been able to and then home feels bare until we can replace the missing things with different ones. I still wish I could go back and get some of them – the roll top desk, the dressers.
Family, both in the house and in the area, make a house feel like home. A dining table where the household sits and eats meals and plays games. Puzzles, plants, paper, pencils, tools and photographs are always there. Space to work on projects.
Here are some links to posts I wrote about all the places I lived and other important streets in my life. Index to streets in my life.
It was 1956 and my mother, sister, grandfather and I were on our way to a few weeks out of Detroit at my Uncle Louis’ cottage in Idlewild. Click all images to enlarge.
It started here, with an open door. Our door was the one on the right, the Bowles family lived through the door on the left. We didn’t have security doors in those days. 2705 Calvert. We lived in the upper flat. This is a photo taken after a fire in the early 2000s.
Me, my mother and sister Pearl on the dock that summer. Pearl has her walking doll. 1956
My sister Pearl and me on the beach. 1956. I was 9 and Pearl was 7.
I can’t believe I missed my own blogiversary! On May 24 I forgot to celebrate my 4th year of blogging. Somehow it seems like I’ve been doing them for longer than 4 years. I have published 704 posts during that time. What did I do with my time before that? It is really hard to remember. I never even had read a blog before I started mine. I found a whole alternate reality into which I have been fully absorbed.
My sister sent me this postcard while I was waiting for my 4th daughter to be born. The midwife had given a date a month before my actual due date so there was an extra lot of waiting through the Mississippi summer of 1978 until she was finally born September 26.9-12-78
They had their hair bobbed awhile ago, but promised they wouldn’t cut it again until after the baby comes! You see them now, don’t you?? Hang in there!! Love – Pearlita
The story of Tulani’s birth – written shortly after she was born in Jackson, MS September 26, 3:36AM Tuesday (If you don’t want to read the details of a birth, stop right here.)
The midwives I used when my 3rd daughter was born had moved out of town. The two I found were not like the others. Neither had children of their own. They were scary about everything. They said the head was small and they hoped it wasn’t encephalic. To me! They wouldn’t believe that when I said conception probably occurred and placed the due date a month early, then said they didn’t want to do the delivery because I was overdue. They didn’t hook me up with a support doctor, so Jim called the doctor I had used as back up last time and she agreed to do it, although she fussed about the midwives not having a back-up doctor.
Woke up with contractions. Sat up to see if more were coming. They were. Woke up Jim, who timed a few – coming every 5 minutes. I was real glad. Labor was starting the day before the two week deadline ran out. Had dreaded dealing with that after fearing every abnormality possibly connected with pregnancy during this 9 1/2 months. Now, Jim called someone else to see if the kids could spend the day there since the other people worked. Then it was almost 10 o’clock so he suggested we call the doctor since the contractions were so quick. I was doing deep regular breathing which I did until transition, but blowing out rather harder than breathing in. I asked if he was sure we wanted to go in so soon since we probably had a 9 hour wait ahead of us. But finally I agreed. He called the doctor who was off that night and another lady doctor fills in for her. She said we better come on since fourth babies may come pretty quick.
I threw up once or twice as we were getting ready to leave. All loaded up and left. Dropped the kids down the road. Carrie Ann came out and said she hoped it came quickly so I wouldn’t still be waiting around in the morning. I said I hoped so too. But was mentally resigned to 9 hours of labor and didn’t expert to deliver until around 9AM.
Got back on highway. Had regular contractions all the way there. Pretty strong. Not looking forward to 9 more hours of labor but glad to be in labor. Threw up or gagged once or twice. Finally got to the hospital around 2AM or a bit before. Jim took me in and upstairs – a guard pushing the wheelchair. I was still breathing the same way, sometimes rubbing my stomach, had no back labor, during final 6 weeks of pregnancy had been told the baby was in posterior position and would cause a long labor by midwife.
On the delivery floor was wheeled into a labor room by one of the nurses on duty. There were 2, a white RN and a black LPN. I asked if the birthing suite was available and it was so we went there – a combination labor and living room where delivery can take place without being moved. I took off my clothes and peed and got into bed while Jim went to check me in. The white RN (while I was peeing) asked if I was having natural birth. I said yes and she (not trying to be unkind) made some comment like “ooohhhhh honey, that’s good, if you could stand it”. I told her I’d done it 3 times and I was sure I could. Glad it wasn’t my first. Continued this while continuing to have regular and strong contractions.
Got into bed and was shaved just a partial and checked. No enema and 5>6 cm’s dilated. I couldn’t’ believe I was that far along. Jim returned. The doctor came in. A little white lady, a bit older than I (I was 32), not 40 yet. She asked if we’d had any special plans we’d discussed with Dr. Barnes. We said just no drugs and keep the baby with us. She said you had to have a special nurse present to keep the baby.
She went back out. The RN kept making dumb comments, trying to be friendly. She said she’d be ready for delivery about 3AM. Ha! I thought. Told me to tell them if I felt like pushing. I felt like pushing a bit, but kept quiet, remembering last time and how I’d pushed mildly for hours before the real push. Then she must have checked me or the doctor did and said I could push when I felt like it. Contractions were almost continuous. So on one or two more pushes I had to push and did. The waters broke and I told them. The RN started saying “sit up, you can’t push laying down!’ I was in the middle of a push, and I was saying “just wait a minute, just wait”. So after that push everyone was rushing around getting ready for the birth. It was about 3AM. They had me sit on some little plastic seat to make it easier to catch the baby.
So, I started pushing, which was a relief. The rests between contractions were longer. I said now they’d probably stop. The doctor said rests were usually longer during 2nd stage. They started seeing head. I pushed harder and finally, actually 15 or 20 minutes I felt that big head coming through and down and made noise as I pushed. There was no pain through the cervix this time, like when Ayanna had her arm up, but the head against the perineum felt like I was going to pop. I was not relaxed. I saw that hair down there on the head, but the main feeling was yikes, I’m going to pop. The doctor said let the contractions deliver and don’t push, so after a years wait (not really) a contraction came, I panted and the head came out. I pushed and it all popped out. For some reason I didn’t look in the mirror while this was going on. But I immediately looked after she came out. And she was squirming around while the doctor suctioned her nose. Didn’t look like much mucus. Was no blueness to her. She gave a short cry. They cut her cord and I picked her up and she was a regular, whole baby, without even a club foot (smile).
Then Jim went to the nursery while they weighted her and examined her. He brought her back because her temperature was stable at 99 already. She nursed a bit then they took my blood pressure and said it was low so took the baby. Jim held her awhile. Then they pushed my uterus (ouch!) and some clots came out. Not firm enough so pushing and shot of pitocin, drip of something else. They didn’t hear about nursing firming up the uterus. Any way I went to sleep and didn’t bleed to death.
Pearl and Albert with their children and 3 of the grandchildren. My sister and I were at our other grandmothers and the youngest 4 were not yet born. 1951.
Because my family seemed to socialized mainly with each other and a few long time family friends, I saw a lot of my aunts and uncles. When I was growing up, we spent every Saturday with my mother’s sister, Mary V. and her daughters at our maternal grandparents. We all rode over and back together. We also lived down the street and went to the same school so we saw her often.
My father’s family was very close and worked on political and freedom causes together through the years. We all went up to Idlewild together. Uncle Louis was our family doctor. My first jobs were working with Henry and Hugh at Cleage Printers. I babysat one summer for Anna and Winslow. I worked at North Detroit General Hospital in the pharmacy with Winslow. I worked with Gladys and Barbara at the Black Star sewing factory. My mother married my Uncle Henry years after my parents divorced so he was like a second father to me. I raked their memories for stories about the past for decades.
My mother and her sister with cousin Dee Dee inbetween. Front row: Me, sister Pearl and cousin Barbara.
Aunts by blood and Uncles by marriage.
Aunt Abbie – my great grandmother Turner’s sister.
I had 4 aunts and 5 uncles, by blood. Two of my uncles died when they were children so I never knew them. All of my aunts married so there were 4 uncles by marriage. Three, Ernest, Frank and Edward, were eventually divorced from my aunts. I didn’t see them very much after that. Ernest lived in NYC and only appeared now and then so I didn’t know him very well beyond the fact he was very good looking and polite. Uncle Frank, who we called ‘Buddy’, was a an electrician. I remember him taking us to Eastern Market and boiling up a lot of shrimp,which we ate on soda crackers. And a story he told about a whirling dervish seen in the distance that turned into a dove. Edward, who we called Eddie was a doctor and I remember little about him except he was quiet and when I had a bad case of teenage acne, offered to treat it for me. Uncle Winslow was there to the end. I saw him often and I felt very connected to him. He had a wicked sense of humor and liked to talk about the past when I was in my family history mode. None of my uncles were married during my lifetime so I had no aunts by marriage.
We didn’t call our aunts and uncles “aunt” and “uncle”. We called them by their first names only. I did know two of my great aunts, my maternal grandmother’s sisters, Daisy and Alice. I knew one of my 2 X great aunts, Aunt Abbie. She lived with my grandparents until she died in 1966. Aunt Abbie was Catholic and I still have a Crucifix that she gave me.
I remember calling Daisy “Aunt Daisy”, but Alice was just “Alice”. Aunt Daisy had a distinctive voice and she laughed a lot. I remember going to dinner at their house once, and going by on holidays.
My maternal grandmother’s sisters, Aunts Alice and Daisy. On Bob-lo Island 1961.
There were a host of great aunts and uncles that I never met but I knew from stories about them so that I felt like I knew them. Aunt Minnie and Uncle Hugh were my paternal grandmother’s siblings. I must have met several of my paternal grandfather’s siblings but I was small and don’t remember them, Uncle Jake, Uncle Henry, Aunt Josie and their spouses. And on the maternal side I heard so much about my great grandmother Jennie’s siblings that I felt I knew them too. When I started researching, these were not strangers – Aunt Willie, Aunt Mary, Aunt Beulah, Aunt Anna.
2X Great Grandmother Eliza and her children. My 2X great aunts and uncle. Aunt Mary, Ransom, Aunt Abbie, Aunt Beulah, Eliza, Great Grandmother Turner, Aunt Anna and Aunt Willie. Don’t know why Ransom was just ‘Ransom’.
We didn’t call any of my parent’s friends ‘aunt’ or ‘uncle’. Not surprising since we didn’t call our own aunts and uncles, ‘aunt’ and ‘uncle’.
Left to right: My grandfather Albert Cleage with my great aunt and great uncles, Aunt Josie, Uncle Ed. Back L Uncle Henry, back R Uncle Jake.
I haven’t participated Saturday Night Genealogy Fun lately but I came across this one and it seemed interesting so here is a tally of my 1st cousins, 2nd cousins and several degrees of removed cousins. I am several weeks late but you can find the original challenge at the link above.
1) Take both sets of your grandparents and figure out how many first cousins you have, and how many first cousins removed (a child or grandchild of a first cousin) you have.
My Paternal Side
The Cleage family about 1930 in front of their house on Scotten. From L to R Henry, Louis, (My grandmother) Pearl, Barbara, Hugh, Gladys, Anna, Albert Jr (My father) and (My grandfather) Albert Sr.
My father had 6 siblings.
His three brothers had no children. His oldest sister had one son. His second sister had four children. His youngest sister had two daughters. I have seven first cousins on this side.
My sister Pearl in the blue. Cousin Jan in the red. Behind Jan, Warren. Front right, Dale. Behind Dale, Ernie and behind him, me. About 1958.
Front are my other 3 cousins. In zipped coat on left, Maria. Center, Blair. On right, Anna. Aunts & uncles in background.
Warren has two daughters. They have a total of seven children.
Jan has three daughters and one son. They have a total of five children.
Ernest has two children. No grandchildren.
Anna has four children and three grandchildren.
Maria has two children. No grandchildren.
Dale has one child. Unknown number of grandchildren.
I have 14 first cousins once removed on this side and 15 cousins twice removed here.
My Maternal Side
Mershell holding my mother Doris, Fannie Graham in front Mershell Jr. and Mary Virginia. 1927
My mother had three siblings. Both of her brothers died as children. Her sister had 3 daughters.
My mother Doris & her sister Mary V with their children – Cousins Dee Dee, Barbara & Marilyn with dark hair. Sister Pearl and myself with braids.
Dee Dee has three children. They have eight children.
Barbara has two children. They have five children.
Marilyn has one son, who has two children.
I have three first cousins on this side, six cousins once removed and 15 cousins twice removed.
This makes a grand total for me of ten first cousins, 22 first cousins once removed and 24 cousins twice removed.
2) Extra Credit: Take all four sets of your great-grandparents and figure out how many second cousins you have, and how many second cousins once removed you have.
Second Cousins are the children of your parent’s 1st cousin and the grandchildren of your grandparent’s siblings (your granduncles/grandaunts).
Howard and Jennie (Allen) Turner – Maternal great grandparents
My maternal grandmother had two sisters. Neither of them married or had children.
Fannie, Jennie (mother) Alice. Daisy standing.
William and Mary (Jackson) Graham – Paternal Great grandparents.
My maternal grandfather’s sister Annie Graham
Annie Graham’s children.
My maternal grandfather, Mershell Graham, had four siblings. Crawford and William disappeared from the records after 1880. Jacob and Abraham died childless. Annie had 4 children. My mother had four first cousins. That gives me four first cousins once removed. Between them they had 20 children, giving me 20 second cousins.
Buford Averitt and Anna Ray Reed
My paternal grandmother Pearl Reed Cleage had 7 siblings.
Josephine had two children. Unfortunately the family lost contact with those children after 1900.
Sarah had nine children. Between them, they had 14 children.
Louise had two children. Between them they had six children.
Hugh had four children. Between them they had 13 children.
Minnie had 12 children. Between them they had 30 children.
Two Reed cousins. My father and his brothers with Uncle Hugh Reed Averett’s sons. Front are Henry and Hugh Cleage. Back are my father Albert Cleage, Hugh Averett, Thomas Averett and Louis Cleage.
Mullins cousins
My father had 29 first cousins on his mother’s side. He had 63 first cousins once removed on his mother’s side. Josie’s Branch disappeared. That gives me 63 known second cousins on this side.
Louis and Celia (Rice) Cleage
Cleage Cousins – some of Albert, Henry and Edwards children.
My paternal grandfather Albert B. Cleage had four siblings. Henry had four children. They had a combined total of three children. Edward had six children. They had a combined total of seven children. Josie had five children. They had a combined total of 22 children.
My father had 15 first cousins on his father’s side. He had 29 first cousins once removed. That gives me 29 second cousins on this side.
So, on my father’s side I have 43 first cousins once removed and 93 second cousins. On my mother’s side I have 4 first cousins once removed and 20 second cousins making a combined total of 47 first cousins once removed and 113 second cousins.
How Many Second Cousins Once Removed?
Then I realized that all of my parents second cousins were my second cousins once removed. So, I have been updating and looking at my ancestry tree. I think I’m about ready to take a count.
In June of 1980 my sister Pearl and her daughter visited us in our home on St. John’s Road Mississippi. My husband, Jim, took this photo of both of us and our children. The one with her eyes closed is Pearl’s daughter. I thought it would be interesting to take an entry from her journal, as it appears in her new book “Things I Should Have Told My Daughter – Lies, Lessons & Love Affairs” by Pearl Cleage and, since I wasn’t keeping a journal at the time, take old letters and put something of what was happening in my life at the time.
Pearl, Ife, Ayanna, Jilo, Deignan, me holding Tulani. June 1980, St. John’s Road, Mississippi. We must have been saying “Cheese!”
Pearl had recently moved to her own apartment, leaving her husband and devoting her time to writing and figuring out freedom. From Pearl’s journal about her life in Atlanta …
“June 5, 1980
I have just discovered the only advantage to freelancing. You get to be stoned while you earn a living. Unfortunately, that is also true of rock and roll stars, actors who are lucky enough to be cast in Robert Altman films, Rastafarians, and particularly foolhardy circus preformers. I think it also applies to the construction crews that do most of the renovations that I know about. It also applies to artists of all kinds, but since I was talking about freelancing, which is a way of making money, let’s leave the art out of it, shall we?”
Meanwhile, several states over in Mississippi…June 17, 1980 from a letter to my father
Dear Daddy,
How’s it going? It’s hot, hot, hot here. It’s been a strange weekend. Kibibi – the 25 year old woman who lived a weird summer with us at Luba when we first came to MS was shot 3 times in the head by her 10 month baby’s daddy during an argument. It was such a ridiculous, unexpected, stupid thing.
I remember Kibibi sister’s husband coming up the stairs of the house on stilts and telling us about the shooting. Given that the civil rights violence had barely ended, it seemed horribly sad that she was shot to death by her daughter’s father.
